Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
it glows. i had to have it.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
