i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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