the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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