Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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