whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize