Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
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