So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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