Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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