Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
3pm strippers are depressing
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
