My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
