the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
