Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Randomize
