omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
false alarm, still single
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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