It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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