I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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