look no pants
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
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