we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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