and you said cock pushups were impossible
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
whose ass print is on the piano?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize