I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
