i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
His nipple licking is glorious
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