I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
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