How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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