This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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