after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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