i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
the day after is always just damage control
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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