ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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