Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Is this like a preordered booty call?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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