She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize
