kristin has been a bad kristin
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
