The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
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