pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
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