awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
