Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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