you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
