Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
