when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
