his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
