i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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