do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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