i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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