discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
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