Apparently you make a good broom.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
