I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Randomize
