I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
