This girl is more easily done than said...
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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