Already got asked if we're dating
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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