i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
