if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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