This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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