3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I have aggressive nipples.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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